HILARIOUS JOKES AND HUMOR ARCHIVES


An elderly man was very ill, and lay in his bed fully expecting to die at any time. In death's agony, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookies wafting up the stairs.

The smell was so overwhelming that he somehow managed to gather his remaining strength to lift himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort forced himself down the stairs, gripping the railing with both hands.

With labored breath, agony, and pain from the excursion, he leaned against the kitchen door frame for rest and gazed into the room. Were it not for his physical pain he would have thought himself already in heaven because there, spread out upon newspapers on the kitchen table, were literally hundreds of his favorite chocolate chip cookies.

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man? Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself toward the table, landing on his knees in a rumpled posture.

His parched lips parted as he began to imagine the taste of the wondrous cookies already in his mouth. The thought actually invigorated him, seemingly bringing him back to life. His old and aged hand slowly made its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife.

"Stay out of those," she snapped. "They're for the funeral."


What is heaven like to you?

And I saw a new heaven and a new earth: for the first heaven and the first earth were passed away; and there was no more sea. And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.

And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God.

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.

And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful. And he said unto me, It is done. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely.

He that overcometh shall inherit all things; and I will be his God, and he shall be my son. But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death. -Revelation 21:1


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