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HILARIOUS JOKES AND HUMOR ARCHIVESA tough old cowboy once counseled his grandson that if he wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a little gunpowder on his oatmeal every morning. The grandson did this religiously and he lived to the very old age of 93. When he died, he left 14 children, 28 grandchildren, 35
great grandchildren, and a fifteen foot hole in the wall
of the crematorium.
 My son, forget not my law; but let thine heart keep my commandments: For length of days, and long life, and peace, shall they add to thee. Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart: So shalt thou find favour and good understanding in the sight of God and man. Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil. It shall be health to thy navel, and marrow to thy bones. Honour the LORD with thy substance, and with the firstfruits of all thine increase: So shall thy barns be filled with plenty, and thy presses shall burst out with new wine. My son, despise not the chastening of the LORD; neither be
weary of his correction: For whom the LORD loveth he
correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he
delighteth. -Proverbs 3:1 in your email automatically! ********************************************************** |