HILARIOUS JOKES AND HUMOR ARCHIVES
"Son, where's your homework?" The teacher said sternly to
the little boy while holding out her hand.
"My dog ate it," was his solemn response.
"Son, I've been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really
expect me to believe that?"
"It's true, Teacher, I promise it is," insisted the little
boy. "I had to smear it with honey, but I finally got
him to eat it."
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What's your excuse?
The kingdom of heaven is like unto a certain king, which
made a marriage for his son, And sent forth his servants to
call them that were bidden to the wedding: and they would
not come. Again, he sent forth other servants, saying, Tell
them which are bidden, Behold, I have prepared my dinner: my
oxen and my fatlings are killed, and all things are ready:
come unto the marriage.
But they made light of it, and went their ways, one to his
farm, another to his merchandise: And the remnant took his
servants, and entreated them spitefully, and slew them. But
when the king heard thereof, he was wroth: and he sent forth
his armies, and destroyed those murderers, and burned
up their city.
Then saith he to his servants, The wedding is ready, but
they which were bidden were not worthy. Go ye therefore into
the highways, and as many as ye shall find, bid to the
marriage. So those servants went out into the highways, and
gathered together all as many as they found, both bad and
good: and the wedding was furnished with guests.
And when the king came in to see the guests, he saw there a
man which had not on a wedding garment: And he saith unto
him, Friend, how camest thou in hither not having a wedding
garment? And he was speechless. Then said the king to the
servants, Bind him hand and foot, and take him away, and
cast him into outer darkness; there shall be weeping and
gnashing of teeth. For many are called, but few
are chosen. -Matthew 22:2
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