HILARIOUS JOKES AND HUMOR ARCHIVES
A rich man went to his pastor and said, "I want you and your
wife to take a three-month trip to the Holy Land at my
expense. When you come back, I'll have a surprise for you."
The pastor accepted the offer, and he and his wife went off
to the Middle East.
Three months later they returned home and were met by the
wealthy parishioner, who told them that while they were
gone, he had a new church built.
"It's the finest building money can buy, pastor," said the
rich man. "No expense was spared." And he was right. It was
a magnificent edifice both outside and in.
But there was one striking difference. There was only one
pew, and it was at the very back. "A church with only one
pew?" asked the pastor.
"You just wait until Sunday," the rich man said.
When the time came for the Sunday service, the early
arrivals entered the church, filed onto the one pew and sat
down. When the pew was full, a switch clicked silently, a
circuit closed, the gears meshed, a belt moved and,
automatically, the rear pew began to move forward. When it
reached the front of the church, it came to a stop. At the
same time, another empty pew came up from below at the back
and more people sat down. And so it continued, pews filling
and moving forwards until finally the church was full, from
front to back.
"Wonderful!" said the pastor, "Marvelous!"
The service began, and the pastor started to preach his
sermon. He launched into his text and, when 12 o'clock came,
he was still going strong, with no end in sight. Suddenly a
bell rang, and a trap door in the floor behind the pulpit
"Wonderful!" said the congregation, "Marvelous!"
Do you fulfill your "religious" obligations because its the
right thing to do, or because you love the God for whom you
Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For ye pay
tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the
weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith:
these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other
Ye blind guides, which strain at a gnat, and swallow a
camel. Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For
ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but
within they are full of extortion and excess.
Thou blind Pharisee, cleanse first that which is within the
cup and platter, that the outside of them may be clean also.
Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For ye are
like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful
outward, but are within full of dead men's bones, and of all
Even so ye also outwardly appear righteous unto men, but
within ye are full of hypocrisy and iniquity. -Matthew 23:23Previous Joke | Back to the Archives | Next Joke
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